Our Wedding
Biographies
So this is what we know about Brian. In his earliest years, he gained a reputation as one of the most promising writers of his generation. Then fourth-grade came. His family packed a wagon, shot their old, sick dog and headed south to the hardscabble streets of Tarpon Springs, Florida. His emerging genius was again recognized, but he was diagnosed with a tragic disorder that gave him very bad handwriting.
In sixth grade, the world looked with anticipation toward Brian's triumphant journey to space camp. But on the very day he was to ship off to Titusville, he fell ill and missed the trip. When all the kids came back the next week and showed the tape of their amazing trip, their Trip To Space Camp, Brian expected outporings of sympathy for his misfortune. None were expressed.
But let us not dwell in the past. Let us, as the old television program implores, think about "What's Happening Now?"
Now, since you asked, Brian is at law school in New York. Recently, Brian approached a kindly security guard quietly listening to a World Series game on a small radio. "How's it going?" Brian asked the guard. "Oh, fine," the man replied, happy someone had inquired about his well-being. The long, lonely hours had been punctured by the voice of a concerned stranger.
"No, I mean the game," Brian responded.
Brian really said this. What a jerk, this guy. He must be stopped.
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 And what is known of Deb, her richly textured life, her hopes and dreams, her much-inquired-about wheat penny collection? If she revealed it all right here, she might not be able to sell it to you later in the form of a thinly veiled biography. The highlights: Deb was a child of meager beginnings. Her parents were not too too poor. Her mother was not a barmaid and her father, not a pirate. These were some of Deb's earliest remembered disappointments. Deb was a bright but troubled child with a lust for cutting paper into ever-smaller pieces and a special flair for moping. She combined these prodigious talents with her skillful handling of the Apple IIc to produce her first great masterpiece, "The Greedy Witch". The play was performed by Deb's second-grade class to the critical acclaim of her mother, and was noted for its daring use of lollipop rings. Despite this earlier success, fame has been a long time in coming. Deb remained largely unpopular until the mid-nineties, when one popular girl told another popular girl she thought Deb was "okay", because "her clothes never matched", and this was "kind of funny". Later, Deb attended a school which was to train her to be a famous writer. A school full of other unmatching, paper-snipping people, some of whom reveled to her that $400 a credit hour would not buy her fame. Only the exorbitantly high real estate prices of New York City could buy fame. So she moved to Queens, where she is every day one step closer to being discovered.
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